Monday, January 21, 2013

Myth IV

Sometimes I feel like all the people around me have so much turmoil in their lives, while mine seems to float serenely on a lake as still as glass. Much of that feeling must be attributed to the fact that most of my friends and those close to me are younger than me and are only just starting their careers and deciding what they want their lives to look like. Some are having relationship issues. Some work in the chaotic fields of the arts. Some are dealing with a combination of several events or situations all at once. On top of all that, nobody who is close to me makes very much money, although I can think of one or two who might be in my tax bracket.

I’ve been thinking lately about the existence of “happily ever after,” the notion that at some point our story stops being one worth telling and we live happily until the end of our days. This is the notion that’s reinforced in our storytelling tradition – every story has a beginning and an ending. But life isn’t like that, is it? Life is an ongoing comic series where you can’t read ahead, rather than a book. Stuff just keeps happening. Sometimes it’s bad, sometimes it’s good, but it doesn’t stop until we draw our last breath, and even then, the story goes on through the people we leave behind.

It’s been a busy month for TSMC with more than 10 movies and TV episodes shown so far in January. Last Tuesday, Puck and I met Katie at a cafĂ© on Christopher Street for Teresa’s solo art show. I bought one of her original ballpoint and marker/mixed media pieces entitled “The Unknown Woman”. I liked it because it’s ambiguous and started a fun conversation among the group about what it was actually depicting. I’m going to get it more nicely framed and find a place to hang it so T can visit her work someday.

Last night was the fourth edition of Myth, which has become one of the biggest sex parties in New York. It’s my second time to attend, and Puck’s third, and I actually had a pretty decent time even though I’m not really into things like that. In fact, I probably haven’t been to a play party since last year’s Myth. Once again, I volunteered to do massages in the aftercare area, which was pretty much the highlight of my night, plus receiving my own massage from one of the other volunteers.

The venue at Webster Hall was much larger this year, and consequently, there were a lot more people. Most of my kinky friends were there, including Piper, Beth, Aaron, Rachel, Kiwi, Stella, Ilan, Stan, Jaz, Dee, Dave, Emily (who remembered me at Friday’s MMMM from Dave’s birthday party last year), Josh (who went out Saturday with Puck to see Picnic), and a few other familiar faces that I haven’t learned the names for yet. So even though the crowd was larger, every year I know more and more people and that makes it more comfortable for me.

This year I met Kiwi’s Myth buddy, Jani (pronounced like Johnny), while standing in line, plus had some interaction with Jessie at the pre-Myth munch and during the event. I gave Jani a foot rub during my shift as masseuse because she’d been on her feet tending her pets at the party.

I gave massages to three other women and one man during my hour shift. One of them said she was having visions of faerie while on the table. Maybe I do have some fae in me after all, like Sookie Stackhouse. I even got tips from two of the other women for my work, an unexpected bonus.

At the party there was all kinds of sexytimes going on: sex while suspended with ropes, flogging, wrestling in kiddie pools filled with glitter, microbranding, cuddle piles, makeouts, etc. One corner of the bar had what’s called the Hitachi Reading Series, named for a popular brand of vibrator. People took turns reading prose or poetry while being stimulated under a table with a vibrator until they had an orgasm and couldn’t continue reading. Actually, that was pretty arousing. Puck wanted to try it with one of their own poems, but unfortunately had to start their volunteer shift at the front door 30 minutes early and lost their place in line. 

About the only play I did was strip down to my underwear and join in a cuddle pile in front of the main stage with Puck, Dee, Josh, Britt and Aaron. I also did my massages in my undies since my beaded and embellished dress is very constraining on movement.

Frankly, this sort of thing is rapidly losing its appeal for me since I’m identifying more and more as gray-A (asexual) and not looking for a relationship. I still like hanging out with my friends, but I don’t really get much out of being surrounded by sexytimes and the smell of all the sex going on (as River Tam might say). It is an interesting experience, to say the least.

Thursday, January 03, 2013

2012 in review

Well, we made it through 2012 and the world didn't end. I guess that is a good thing.

It's hard for me to describe this year in a pithy one-word theme as I've done in years past. There's been some good things and some not so good things. Some of the highlights include my year-long yoga practice, my birthday celebration ("Birthday dinner" - July 16, 2012), the road trip with Puck ("Road trip 2012" - March 14, 2012) and meeting all our friends along the way, especially Morgan, who I've known for my entire 8-year-old life and never had the chance to meet until now.

Speaking of friends, I feel I've recently reconnected to old friends like Lori, Agnieszka and others; strengthened my existing day-to-day connections with friends like Kacey, Piper, Katie and many more; and made some new friends in the latter half of the year – Chelsea, Natalie, Liz and others – whom I really hope to spend more time with in 2013.

I've put more emphasis on friendships in part because of ending my four-year relationship with Puck ("Fourth anniversary" – Oct. 7, 2012). The reasons for it are complicated and difficult to explain, but I'm sure it is for the best for both of us. Long story short is that we simply couldn't agree on a set of relationship agreements that we could abide by in the long term. However, unlike other endings in my life, this one has a beginning since we are still family and continue to find ways to make each other happy outside the context of a formal relationship.

This was also the year I resigned as President of Open Love NY, the polyamory organization Puck and I helped to start. From less than 50 people at Puck's 19th birthday party in 2009, the group has grown to over a thousand people in three years. For myself, I feel like I'd done everything I could do to start the organization on the right path and it was time for new blood to take the group to its next level of development.

Other highlights for me and Puck throughout the year were going to Wicked Faire with Piper and Jet ("Wicked Faire 2012!" – Feb. 20, 2012) and going to events with Morgan ("Steampunk World’s Fair" – May 25, 2012, "PenRenFaire" – Oct. 25, 2012).

On the stage, I saw Porgy & Bess, Cyrano de Bergerac, Priscilla Queen of the Desert (twice), Peter and the Starcatcher, several episodes of Shotz!, P.S. Jones and the Frozen City, Bare, and Aida with Puck and/or other friends.

In the movies, it was the year of The Avengers, the climax of The Dark Knight and Twilight movies, the start of The Hunger Games and Wreck-It Ralph. I sat through the entire nine-movie Best Picture Showcase (“Oscar roundup 2012” – Feb. 26, 2012) and my video projector returned to my living space, giving me an excuse to put on movie viewing parties and come out of my shell a bit.

I think that 2013 is going to be full of changes, some of them good and some of them not so good. I can only hope that the first outweighs the second.