Thursday, March 03, 2011

Sex dream

Had an interesting sex dream last night, unusual since I only got about four hours of sleep. I was invited to a party by a female friend. We entered a large open space that was filled with people who were all laying on mats having sex with each other. It looked like a yoga studio of sex.

She was showing me an app on a smart phone related to this party where we could make a suggested donation for attending, so I contributed $20. We laid down on an empty mat and she got on top of me. And while the physical sensations were nice, I remember feeling ill at ease, like I couldn’t really let myself go. I don’t think it was because of anything to do with her (in real life I’m not really attracted to her); I think it was more that, after Bonnie, I’m feeling a little gun-shy when it comes to sex.

Totally random note – I saw this show called “The Best Thing I Ever Ate” and it had a recipe I wanted to try for beer nuts that are served at a bar near Union Square. You take a can of plain mixed nuts and put them on a cookie sheet in a 400 degree oven for about 5-10 minutes until they are really hot. Mix in a large bowl a stick of butter, brown sugar, sea salt, ground cayenne pepper and fresh sprigs of rosemary. Pour the hot nuts in and stir to melt the butter and mix the ingredients. Very simple recipe and it sounds delicious.

Life is pretty routine at the moment, but there are still simple pleasures to be had. Yesterday I left work early to attend the OLNY leadership meeting, so it was the first time in months that I’ve left work in full sunlight. I was standing out on the train platform, and it was a moderately windy day, and very dry. The smell of the air reminded me of fall outings with my family, hiking in the forests, visiting pumpkin patches. The sun warmed my skin while the air was cold and the wind was bracing.

It felt good to be alive.